bahagia..

salam

welcome to 2010...

dah msk taun baru ni buat aku terpikir,
yang aku ni dah 20 tahun, so aku ptt lbh matured la kan.
huhuhu.
btw, boleh x nak wat wish sempena new year ni??

aku nak bahagia,, mcm org lain.
bkn aku x bahagia skrg, tp kalo blh nak lbh bahgia.
can aa????
manusia mmg x pnh ckp ngan apa yg ada, tp i just can't change it.hurrmmm..

right noe, im missing some1.
since aku dah nk balik esok, aku rasa cam sedih lak.
hopefully, aku dpt jumpa dia sblm pegi..
if i lose u, then, there is no replacement ever..
so, pleaseee ......
Pray to GOD,
that i want to be happy as others... Aminnn

dear, i miss uuu.
I.L.U.S.M.T.D.E.O.M.L.

it's time.

perhaps dah tiba masa utk aku brbh kot.
aku x rasa ada org yg fhm aku.
kalo ada pn, mgkin cket je. even my family pn x fhm aku.

so, biar aku bgtau ttg dr aku.
secara luar, aku nmpak garang, bengis, jahat n kasar
tp, aku sbnrnya garang pd waktu ttntu jer + aku sbnrnya soerg yg happy go lucky.
aku punya hati yg halus sbb 2 bl org kata or buat smthg kat aku, aku akn cpt terasa.
walaupn aku nmpk mcm xde ht prt, tp aku mdh simpati kat org. aku akn cb tlg org selagi aku mmpu.
aku akui aku sgtttttttttttttt manja, sgttttttttttt dahagkn ksh syg, tp salahke kalo aku cmtu??
perlu ke aku disalahkan sdgkan org lain yg bt mslh.

well, mayb nasib aku.
so, from now on, i'm gonna change my atttde.
aku xkan jd budak manja lagi, aku akn berdikari.
someone said this to me :
" cblah jd matured skt, umur pn dh pnjg, xyahla jd mnja "

that's y aku nk ubh perangai.
aku xkan gelak over, n buat paper scra over.
perhaps aku akn jd seorg yg selfish. maybee...
tp, ape yg pntg, aku xkan MANJA dah,

sorry kalo sikap mnjaku ini x disenangi oleh org lain..
maaf...

selamat hari raya eduladha.

dunno

salam,
final exam dah dekat woo!!!
tp aku x readya gi
frankly speaking, ak x nmpak agi DL aku sem ni.

aku takut giler,
Dear GOD, please help me....
sem ni br aku nak rasa sedikit tension bila msk fast track
x penah 2 sem aku ase cmtu
mays sbb sem ni aku mals kot+ kwn2 yg dpt high marks
lagila rasa tercabar.
but, frenz, i'll totally perform during FINAL!!!!!
i wont give up

janjiku pada umi untuk berjaya, maka kejayaan akan aku kejar.
* sedikit poyo

satu agi, aku ada msk satu persatuan ni,
tp, mayb aku akn tarik diri coz aku mcm dipinggirkan
apa yang dorng buat, aku xtau
coz xder org bgtau.
aku memg kisah sesangat!!!!!!!!!!!

that's why mayb aku akn mlgkah keluar dr ctu kot
or mayb berthan lagi st sem.
tgkla camne.
klah, study, study.
hehehhe

i will

urm,,
pikir2 balik,
he is a good guy.

kwn2 aku byk ckp cmtu,
then dia pn mcm cb ptahankan hbgn kitorg.

bg aku, dia setia walaupun smtimes ssh skit nk paham
hehehehe. sorry, b.
so, in other words.

aku akan pertahankan hbgn ni sampai akhir!!!!!
yes,, my will.
so, kita sm2 cuba k,

ilysmtteoml.

..life..

salam,
suddenly, aku rasa nak berblog
mayb sbb aku rasa aku alone hari ni kot.

urm, sebenarnya byk jer assgmnt yg tertimbun yg blm siap
tapi, ntahla
aku x tau apa yg x kene ngan aku sem ni
aku seakan2 x nampak lagi result aku utk sem ni.
aku ni malas sgt ker??
or aku mmg cmni. aku sendiri x paham diri aku,
apalagi org lain yg kononnya paham ngan diri aku.
huhuhu.

btw, frankly speaking, it's hard 4 me to assume some1 as bezfren.
sbb tu, sampai skunk, aku aser aku xder kawn baik
walaupun aku baik ngan sume orang.heehehe.
tapi, hakikatnya begitulah.
it's not easy 2 find a person who understnd u in & out and
still accepr u as u are.
x mudah, tapi aku harap akan aku jumpa nanti.
Insya Allah.

aku join mcm2 kelab utk cr some1 as bezfren,
tapi yg aku jumpa hanya fren
n kehdpn aku sgt kosong sbnrnya.
aku selalu terfikir bila masanya utk aku jadi muslimah yg btl2 beriman
n seorg anak yg btl2 patuh.
aku nak pnhkan tggjwb aku yg tu,
n bcoz of that, aku terfikir
it is better 4 me 2 be alone thn couple.
but, do i have the guts?
well, biar masa tntukan
sbb aku akan trs berusaha utk cari apa yg aku nak dlm hidup.

bila aku tgk org P shppg, aku terpikir
kenapa prmpuan suka shopping( sbb aku x suka shpg),
kenapa lelaki minat bola n mcm 2 lagi la.
perhaps, sbb setiap org tu berbeza, jadi sbb tulah manusia
ni unik dan dikatakan ciptaan yang sempurna.

a person cannot live alone, he need some1 to live with.
ssorg akn mlengkapi hidup ssorg, sbb tu lah kita dicipta dengan
pelbagai perangai.huhuhu.
aku amik contoh entertainment.(osmate aku )
mira n izni happy bila blh shpg,
kak wanie n pkah happy bila blh kuar ngan husband to be,
farah happy bila result dia bgus..
n aku happy bila aku dpt buat yg terbaik dlm keje aku.

sbb 2la, aku kata manusia berbeza.
walaupn aku byk giler kkrgn, tapi
aku cb baiki, so that aku blh jadi someone.
aku ada impian, aku ada tggungjawab dan aku ada masa
yg perlu aku stabilkan supaya roda kehidupan aku berputar di atas paksi.

aku nk jadi bgs dalam pljrn, kelab dan aku nk jadi contoh yg baik 4 everyone,
but, aku selalu wonder, "do i have the capability 2 do all those things?"
i have no answer till now.
sometimes, aku rasa khdpn boring, tapi aku sedar
aku yg mncrokkan khdpan aku, jadi aku perlu jadikannya secantik pelangi di langit.
an excitement is differ 4 each person.

mmg pnjg post aku kali ni
coz aku kurg masa nak tulis blog
huhuhu.
ni pun sbb aku lonely.
hurmmm.

what happen

well, debat punya program dah habis,
so,aku agak lega.

tp, seriously aku x tau naper aku raser
cam sedih jer.
rasa cam nak nangis.
aku x penah rasa kasih sayang org lain
selain family aku.
walau byk mana persatuan aku masuk,
tp aku mcm xtau diowg syg aku ke x.
hakikatnya, aku syg budak2 debat aku n
aku syg osmate aku.
tapi, maybe sbb aku ni jenis yg sensitif,
so, bila org kata benci aku jer, aku terus
rasa nak nangis.

ramai org kata aku nk selalu membzkan diri
dengan debat la, perfact la, itula, inila.
tpi, aku mmg jns yg xleh duk diam.
kalo aku duk diam, nanti perkara yg bkn2 aku buat.
masih ramai yg x memahami aku + dia.

aku sedih biler org kata aku x wat tggjwb aku,
aku sedih biler org kata aku x pndai bhagi masa,
n aku sedih bila aku sorang2. sedih sgt2.
dahla tu, selasa ni ada presentation bel+ ctu+ test marketing.

x cukup ngan mslh belajar, mslh kwn2, mslh kewangan n byk lagi la
tp, apakan daya, hidup sebagai manusia
aku xleh lari dr semua tu.
i have 2 face it no matter what.

aku tulis semua ni kat blog coz aku tau
x saper yg bc blog aku
so, aku xperlu rs malu nk tls.

btw, life must go on.
aku pnh btekad,
kalo suatu hari nanti dah xder daper
syg or prlukan aku,
aku akn ttp berdiri dgn kaki aku.
sbb kalo org x perlukan aku,
maka aku x perlukan mereka.

terima kasih utk sesiapa yg syg aku n
anggap aku kwn,
aku akan sentiasa doakan korang bahagia.

btw, juz wanna say that
aku dah x mampu kuarkan air mata
sbb dah byk sgt mengalir.

4 u my love, do please understand me.
ilysmtteoml.

L.C.C.I

salam 2 all...

from the tittle itself, i guess u guys know what
i want to say.
hurrrmmmm.....
well, 2day is disspntg day,i guess.
very disspntd.
first, sorry 2 my mum n dad as i cannot give u
the certificate that i should.
sorry 4 being bad 2 both of u.

well, most of my frenz had knew my result
n it is totally surprising me.

aku sgt xcited nak tau ttg result tu
but at last, aku kecewa.
huhuhuuuhu.
thinking of sitting for the exam again is imposibble
4 me.

Ya Allah, mgkin ni dugaan utk aku.
aku terima semua tu walaupn ht sakit.
uurrrmm.....
thanx 2 frenz yg masih pcaya ngan ability aku.
and 2 those yg dpt good result, congratz.

i will strive 4 my success once again.
DL is the mission n
i won't blame anyone bcoz of my failure.

"Don't blame the floor when u don't know how 2 dance"

PRAY 4 MY SUCCESS.

truth or dare

urm,,
well, not so good 2day, so, frenz, don't get weird.

no,please. don't let it out.
please...
so much burden i have to bear till d end i think i coludn't have it anymore.
i do love them, and i really mean that.
but, it's like nthg i can do to make them happy.
umi, i'll try my best to make him accept it, to make him understand us,
i will n that is my promise.

i keep thinking bout my stdy, family, frenz and him.
i worried bout everything.
i have few frenz n that's y i want them to be happy.
iwant everyone around me to be happy n i'll do my best.
even my heart is hurt, even the burden is getting more & more,
i will always try to make them happy.

umi, ayah> i'll be a good daughter, a good mankind, i won't hurt both of u, i really love u...
papa> .i'm sorry if i can't be the best 4 u, but plizz do accept my weakness.ilysmtteoml
frenz> please let me know if u hate me, let me know bout my mistakes, coz i love every single thing that i have.

p/s: Dear GOD, please bless my family, him, frenz n everyone round me.
:)

agak malas

sbnrnya, malas nak tulis,
tp sbb bosan, so tlsla.

waktu ni, tgh call ngan dia
huhuhu.
blh plak smbl ckp smbl mnaip,kan??
xkesah.

ok, semalam, aku gi mall, bkn watper pun, beli brg dapur n durian.
huhuhu. punyala rakus, beli smpai 2 biji besar padahal aku jer nk mkn.
hehehehehe.
blk umh, kononya nk mkn, tp, mls plak nk mkn. last2, tgk jer durian tu.
mcm x selera plak nk mkn.
tup,tup, mlm tu aku melantak sampai 7 ulas terus+ pulut+santan+gula melaka.
huhuhu.
waktu mkn, x ingat dunia.kenyang pun mkn lagi.
apalagi, mlm tu, sprti biasalh, aku mnderita skt perut lagi.
hahahaahhaha.
si dia bgtau " itu la, tamak sangat, suh beli sebijik, nak dua""
hahaha, kan dah kene bebel.

kesah ari ni plak, aku kuar r ptg td gi Bachok,
pantai yang sangat banyak "angin sedap",
kat sn, mkn mknan yg aku idam2 kan.
huhuhu. + air kelapa eskrem.
huhu. mmg giler ah aku plasak perut aku.
kesian ko perut, sabar ek. bkn aper, blk s.alam, dah x jumpa bnda2 ni semua.
yg waktu nk kuar tu,suh Mr Loni Loni hntr kat kfc, keter plak wat hal,
pe punya nsb r.
las2, suh umi ku hntr .
kat c2, dia plak yg amik aku.
x sgka giler2 dia akn tunaikan janji, utk bw aku jln2
ngan Hnda City dia.
hahahha. pttla aku cr2 kete mula2, x jumpa.
huhuhu.

paper pun, wonderful days!!!!!

2 days more..
:(

i knew it

4 me, 2day is better than yesterday n hoping 2mrw will be better.
no more silence in the car, no more tears ( he wipes it all ).
having a great time as we only left bout 5 days more.
i went out bou 10.15, arrived at bank rakyat 10.25, waiting 4 10 minutes ,
then tragedy happen.
huhuhu.
my mom told me to pay 1.6k to the bank, instead i had paid 1.7k.
hehehehhe. silly mistake n i am forgiven.

then, meet him till 1.15 coz i've got to pick up my sis at her school.
i thought of going ti BILLION with her, but MR LONI LONI want to use the car.
what a messy man!!!.huh...

continue to the afternoon session.
it was very heavily raining, n almost make me 2 fall asleep,
but, i can't. ( perhaps not my habit )
hehehhee.
:)

6.30 pm, i text my fren, FARAH.
this is what our sms look likes:

H : wei, angin sedap ada kat umah aku
F : la, yeke?? nak jugak, angin kat umah aku x sedap la.
H : la, yela.+ plak aircon, lagi sedap.huhuhu.
F : waaaah.. xpela, aku kipas pown jadila, angin sedap gak 2. hehehhe...sedapnya..
H : ko nak ke angin sedap ni?? aku tlg simpankan.
F : ala, xnakla, kang nak bg kat aku dah x sedap, busok adalah. xnakla. hahahaha
H : ala, baru ingat nak bg angin yang kat belakang.hehehe6
F: angin kat belakang????

* korang paham2lah apa yang angin kat blkg ek.huhhuhuhu.

hakikatnya, cuti ni aku sgt rajin utk mnlis blog, sdgkan bukan hobi aku pun.
tapi, xper, cuti ni jer.
bila dah start sem, kompem, x buat pape
hahahahahaha.
aku agak bahagia hari ni.

1 agi, td tgk MENTOR,
then, benci giler ngan ajai sbb riak nk mampos, mntg2la, budak dia dpt mrkah penuh,
pas2, x adil la markah yg Black dpt dr juri, ada ke ptt 11 jer??
hangin tul aku n family.huhuhu.
but, d end, yg ajai tu dpt 54.9 jer, yg Black dpat 63.3.
hahahahhahahaha.
happy giler, sampai tukang pasang tingkap pun tkejut
huhuhuhu.
k, sayonara.

:)

it's almost happen

it's heavily raining 2day,
so, i went out about 3 pm- 4.30.
what a short period.

urm,,, juz keep silence in d car,
saying nothing as we are strangers.
what actually happen??is it bcoz of me???
i'm hurt. totally hurt. crying along d way home is not me.
but, the tears couldn't stop. i have 2 drive in d raining day
with a raining ayes.
tears of me 2day is unexpected.
sorry 4 being the worst..
sorryyy....


ilysmtteoml..
:(

what a day..

semalam, lepas aku sampai umh, terus gi dpur.
bkn cr mknn tau, nk tgk prbhan.
huhhuhu.
mcm explorer plop. bkn aper, sbb parents aku dah tmbh dapur kat
bhgn belakang, so, nak tgk la
hehehehe.

x siap spnhnya agi, tapi aku tgk mmg luas la.
that's not the point.the point is, aku n parents aku
sibuk memindah brg n kemas dapur .
giler letih, bygkan peti ais yg berat mcm gajah tu ( mcm over jer )
aku n bapak aku jer yg angkat.
uih, mmg berotot aku lps ni.
hehehehe.
sampai malam ( x mlm sgt pown ),
pkl 9, dah, aku resign.
letih giler2.
tapi, berbaloi sbb waktu kemas peti, aku jumpa byk
makanan yg aku blh msk utk seminggu,
hahahahahaha.
jimat duit, x yah beli lauk.
kuikuikuui.
paper pun, sbnrnya sajer tulis benda alah ni.

wpun nmpk aku ( nmpak ker?????)
mcm hepi, tapi aku sbnrnya tgh sedih,
tapi, it's ok, it's alright,
i'll survive,
huhuhu.

to be continue.....

:( :)

return of me...

u noe what???
i'm home 2day n abslttly epy bout that.

5 of us fly to ktan 2day, n arrived at lcct
bout 4.15.
oh GOD, that is toooo early as our departure tm is 7..20
huhuhu. not a big deal.
like we all said " sapa cepak lagi baguh dr sekat dale jem"
huhuhu.

ok, settle it down
loni, nok try tulih dle kelate plop.
kita tgk sapo hok baco ni pehe ko dok??
hehehehe.
waktu kat kl central tadi, nok gi la mkn kat mc d.
pahtu, kebetulan penuh, aloh la, sumbak sero.
xpo, xpo, cari gok tepak duduk.
jupo la kusi utk 4 ore.
pahtu, mari pok cik ni, wat muka x tau gi duduk tepak hok
nik cop utk kitorang.
hangin lalu.
mujur ada tepak sor agi.
huhuhu.
conclusionnya, terisi la perut.
br blh nk bas nak gi lcct.
ngatuk pun ngatuk
huhuu.
sapa2, nunggu flight plop.
pahtu, pkl 6.30 baru tahu flight delay sapa pkl 8.
tungu, dan trs menggu,
akhirnya, sapa jgk kat kelantan.
kelantan, tanah air ku..........
hahahahahaha.
mesti x pehe gapo aku ngarut ni
huhuhu

x ku sgka

dah rabu upanya.
exam puN dh hbs, cm tinggal
MYOB jer.
frankly speaking, i think i did quite bad in my exam.
lepas jer first paper,trs migrain,siot tul
exam seterusnya, apa agi
agak hancur la.
isshhhh, knp la jadi mcm ni.
dahla mlm sblm exam, aku lmbt tdr
gara2 lampu yg x dttp.
ok, fine, x per, blh terima lagi.
cuma agak geram bila ada bunyi2 sewaktu nak rest.
huhuhu.hopeflly, markh akan maintain
InsyaAllah

btw, thnx a lot kat farah ( mazlan) coz tmpgkan keter,
huhuhu.
sygggggg farah.
n, b4 terlupa, wish everyone epy2 cuti ni.
sbnrnya, nak lepas geram, tapi,
xtau camner nak lepas kat cni.
so, hasilnya ,
aku dh tls ngarut2.

tapi, ingat,
jgn buat kat owg lain pe yg kita x suka.
got it????????

confusion

hidup kalo x konpiyus, mmg x sah kan.
skunk ni, dahla nak exam, byk plk benda2 mengarut dtg ( bkn bnda halus k).
aku macam pelik r ngape dia makin jauh
padahal dl kwn punya baik,
mayb sbb dah x sehaluan kowt
huhuhu.
sdeynya ayat aku.
paper pun, aku kn survive.
BHASYAH!!!!!!!!!!

apart from that, life must go on.
say what u want 2 say n let me hear it clearly,
orait, babe????
aahhhhh, almost forget.
1 + thing that truly confusing
is y that kind of person is does exist???
i really (30x) hate a selfish person
play the music n hear it urself.
don't bother me, plis???????????
i want to study 2 n d way i *d is differ from u.
so, make d music loud only for u..

urm...
NSAB

the last day of lecture, hopefully
huhuhuhu.

well, the day of writing & thinking will arrived soon,
so, let's get started.
instead of doing what i should start,
i finally messed up.
keep playing computer games just to reach the entrepreneur level

what a stupid i am,
btw, thnx a lot to my frenz that helped me tranferring my things to my sis "cab"
huhuhu.
sis will burst out if she knew this.
hahaha.
just nothing to write,
wondering around the world
to find what is A DAY actually means.